When I Grow Up...

...I want to own a spice shop. Seriously.

I've had this dream for awhile now. I even have a name for it already...Herbivore. I can picture this cute shop with its shabby chic decor filled with herbs and spices. The back door would open up into a moderately sized greenhouse, where I'd grow everything from sweet basil and Italian flat-leaf parsley to marjoram, oregano, chives and garlic. The walls of the shop would be lined with tiny packets of cayenne pepper and freshly ground cinnamon (among other things, of course). I would have a spice bar where my customers could create custom blends of seasonings. Maybe I'd live in the apartment above my little shop. Ever since I got into gardening and maintaining an herb garden, this has been my ideal "grown-up" job.

If only I had the capital...

Update!

I fixed my computer! I found a screw that had come out, so with the tiniest screw driver I could find (a jewelry screwdriver...and even that was too big...I needed an eyeglass screwdriver, but I worked with what I had), I replaced the screw. I pounded a little near where the computer hit the ground and after a few thumps...voila! Good as new! No more red! This is amazing. I thought for sure I was going to have to pay an insane amount of money to have it fixed (maybe "insane" is a bit too strong of an adjective...but at this point, anything greater than $100 is insane to me). That fact mixed with the original price I had paid, plus the fact that it wasn't even three months old yet, I was just super bummed. I'm so excited...I wish you guys could feel what I feel right now...haha.

Always,
Stina

Oops...

Last night, I was on my computer when it slid off the side of my bed. My comforter is made out of this kind of slippery fabric. I didn't think it was a big deal because my bed isn't all that high...maybe two-and-a-half feet off the ground. Well...when I opened my laptop, the screen had this reddish hue to it. I fixed it somewhat, but now, areas that are supposed to show up as black have these tiny red squares on them. It's kind of hard to explain. Also, my computer landed on the side with all the ports. It was plugged in at the time, so it landed on that cord plug (I don't know what it's called), which dented the left corner a little bit. Bottom line, I haven't even had my MacBook Pro for 90 days and I already managed to drop it. I have the extended, three-year Apple Care on it...but...it doesn't cover accidental damage. I don't know how much it would cost to have it fixed. I guess it really doesn't matter...I doubt it'd be under a hundred bucks, so...I guess I'll have to wait a bit to take it in. I'm so mad at myself.

My 27th birthday came and went...it was very laid-back and relaxing, just as I'd hoped it would be. I didn't want to go out and get drunk or anything like that. I can honestly say that I don't miss drinking. I mean, I have a few drinks every now and then, but as far as drinking like I did in college...there's no way I could do that again.

I'm excited that it's Grey's Anatomy night. For now, I think I'm going to take a nap.

Always,
Stina

Now...Don't Think I'm Crazy...

I have been suffering from chronic headaches (I may have mentioned this in a previous post) for the last month or so. They are very specific: the type of pain is the same, the location of the pain is the same, etc. Usually when I get these headaches, it means I need an increase in my Lyrica dosage (for some reason, my body tends to build-up a tolerance to medication very quickly). Well, I now take the maximum dose (200 mg, three times daily...which is doing absolutely nothing for my waistline, by the way...), so an increase is out of the question. When I brought this up to my pain management doctor (Dawn Nehls), she thought that we should try to treat the headache pain. I've been on midrin, fiorinal and amitriptyline, but nothing is working to relieve the pain. My doctor suggested that she should refer me to a neurologist, because she doesn't know what else to do.

Well, today I saw said neurologist and it was a complete waste of time. The guy treated me like a seeker. I even told him that I haven't taken any narcotic pain killers in at least four months because I hate the way they make me feel. He said that I should titrate off the medicine I take and that since I'm young, I shouldn't have the neurostimulator implanted, either. He pretty much told me I should do the opposite of the management plan Dawn and I have worked hard to tweak over the last seven years. He asked if the headaches happen after migraine triggers (chocolate, alcohol, etc.) or if they make me feel nauseated and they don't. He asked if I'm depressed or anxious about my pain and I told him no, to which he replied that my pain "can't be too serious, then". Wait...so...because I'm not reacting to something I have no control over and cannot change, I don't want pain relief? Really??  He told me that our bodies do miraculous things and that I should exercise more and my body will heal itself. Okay, I know I don't make six figures a year, nor do I have a fancy medical degree, but even I know that cartilage does not regenerate. That's why osteoarthritis exists. So...I can exercise until I'm the fittest woman on the planet...I'm still going to be in pain because I will still be without cartilage in my right ankle. This is what makes me angry about my situation...people who don't have real pain go to the doctor for pills and they ruin things for those of us whose pain is very real and very debilitating. I felt like I wasn't being heard during my appointment (marked by the fact that he asked me the same questions four or five times--which also makes me feel like he thinks I was making stuff up...like he was trying to trip me up or something). So...I guess I'm going to call Dawn on Monday and ask for a referral elsewhere. So frustrating...

After my appointment, I sat in my room, trying to think of possible next steps with this whole thing when it hit me...I couldn't really accurately describe my headaches before...but I thought of it: it feels like I have an ice cream headache (or brain freeze, if you will) all day long. Out of curiosity, I googled "ice cream headache" and discovered the medical term for them is sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia. Sphen/o refers to the sphenoid bone, one of the bones that comprises the cranium. Palatine means relating to the palate. "Sphenopalatine" just describes the location/origin of the headache and wasn't nearly as applicable as "ganglioneuralgia". Gangli/o refers to ganglion, which is a group of nerve cells forming a nerve center, especially one located outside the brain or spinal cord. Neur/o pertains to nerves and -algia means pain (Look! My medical terminology course is already paying off!). I have peripheral neuropathy, which is why I take Lyrica in the first place. Is it merely coincidence that when my body is withdrawing from Lyrica, I have these sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia-esque headaches (that was a mouthful!)?!? Also, I came across something called "cervicogenic headaches", which is a headache that is caused from a problem in the spine (such as neuropathy, maybe?). Cervicogenic headaches are also associated with pain, numbness, or weakness of the lower extremities (such as my ankle?), especially if the spinal cord or spinal nerve roots are involved.  Cervicogenic headaches most commonly occur in adults and are not usually associated with nausea, vomiting, visual or hearing changes, and auras. I'm thinking I may have just diagnosed myself (not to sound like a total hypochondriac...).

Now...if only it were Monday so I could talk to Dawn!

Always,
Stina

Hold the Cleaning Products, Please.

On Friday, I picked Jocelyn up from the train station and we checked into our hotel. It was nice, so I'm glad we got our money's worth. That night, we decided to take the Lakefront Brewery tour, which was a blast. I've always wanted to do it, but never got around to it. Their pumpkin ale is amazing...I really want to pick some up. For dinner, we went to my favorite restaurant in Milwaukee, Cubanitas.

Farm Aid on Saturday was great! The food was good, as was the music. It was, by far, the most chill, relaxed concert I've ever been to. Since attending and hearing about "The Good Food" movement, it really just emphasized what I already believe: we shouldn't have to pay more for food that hasn't been fucked around with. Don't treat the animals with antibiotics and hormones...don't "wash" the meat with ammonia...don't flavor it with additives to make it taste like it was intended to in the first place. Food is a basic building block of life. We'll die without it. It's something we all need. But, the food industry has got everything so backward. Everyone just wants to make a quick buck and they'll do whatever it takes to get it. I said before that I really am not into the whole "organic food" movement, but I'm not all for treating food with additives, preservatives and chemicals, either. This really just makes me want to only buy "whole foods" when I go grocery shopping...stuff that's not processed. Convenience foods are nice and everything, but I don't want to eat a bunch of chemicals. Besides, I love making meals entirely from scratch...they taste better, too!

Always,
Christina Ann