School sucks. Hard.

I am so completely over school. I feel like I'm wasting my time. I feel like I won't be happy in my chosen career (medical records) and I dread doing the ungodly amounts of schoolwork we have each day. Why don't I recall undergrad being this hard? I'm supposed to be good at school. This was supposed to be old hat for me. I don't get it. I feel so frustrated and hopeless some days, I just want to give up (or shoot myself in my leg...the bad one, obviously) just so I won't have to do this. Yeah...it's that bad. I start thinking about things like graphic design and how I wish I would've gone to school for that. Then I see other programs at school (like the surgical tech program) and think how cool it would be to do that. But...then I am reminded that maybe I'd have to stand for the entire procedure, and I'd be right back where I was eight years ago. Then I wish I would've stayed at UW-L and studied Student Affairs Administration. I think that's something I would be good at (I hate that I ended that sentence with a preposition, by the way). Then I remind myself how much time I would have to invest if I were to switch my program and how being a professional student isn't really feasible, and I also realize I'm running out of time for this shit. So. Super. Frustrating.

It's usually at this point that I'll look at apartments online, hoping to inspire myself to get it ("it" being school) over with so then I can live in one of these awesome places. Then, I'll mentally go over what I'm looking for in a place...lower of a duplex (or a small house), hardwood floors, dishwasher, washer and dryer in-unit, preferably a 2-bedroom.

Sigh. I am in the tunnel. Where is the end and where's this light I'm supposed to be seeing?